May 25, 2012

Rules are made to be broken

During the first few months of this year in an attempt to re-create some kind of romantic life for myself I've had the sometimes but mostly not-very-pleasurable experience of going on dates.


I don't remember it being this hard when I was 17 or at university but in this new dating world I've been faced with so many rules to remember; what to do on the first, second, third date... what not to do or say, who texts first..


It's all completely ridiculous and in our own minds ..... or is it? These rules exist from somewhere, someone back in the day plucked them out of nowhere OR maybe they all come from this horrific book 'The Rules'. Strapline: Time-tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right. 


Because that's what we were born to do...... capture the heart of Mr. Right. NO. We can do a lot better than that and we've got better things to do than constantly chase Mr Right. 


Also, why can't Mr. Right capture our hearts? Oh yeah, 
a) because Mr. Right doesn't exist (Sorry to burst anyone's bubble) 
b) because we, the woman, is ALWAYS the one who makes herself available... 
c) because The Rules weren't written for men. (Perhaps The Game is its equivalent but that's even more horrific and only advises men on how to play women, in my opinion)


These rules are awful and place the woman in an inferior position (what a surprise), completely and utterly dependent on the man - if he likes her, then it's a go! If she likes him, she has to play it cool.... don't look too desperate, don't text too often, be coy, be mysterious... you do all the 'right' things yet he won't stay.... Oh whaaaat did I doo wrong??? Erm.... how about, you weren't suited to each other? Or, he didn't make one single effort so why would you blame yourself when sometimes, he's the one who needs to chase you. 

Yes, there are lots of rules.....but as I was told at a young age, Rules are made to be broken... So girls, fuck the rules and if you like someone GO FOR IT. MAKE IT OBVIOUS. TEXT HIM. TALK TO HIM. PLAY IT COOL.....for a day. TAKE CONTROL. EMPOWER YOURSELF. 


DO AND SAY WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT.


S


ps. Read here for a Feminist's guide to 'The Rules'

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